Supporting someone with a life-limiting or terminal illness
Advice on how to have difficult conversations, learning about an employee’s diagnosis, making practical and financial arrangements, and what to do if a team member dies.
Title
What's on this page
- Definitions of life-limiting and terminal illnesses
- Having difficult conversations
- Conversation tips
- Learning about their diagnosis
- Employee rights
- Providing support
- Mental health
- Long-term sick leave
- Stopping work
- If a team member dies
- Some things to consider
- Helplines for immediate support
- Next steps
Introduction
If your team member has been diagnosed with a life-limiting or terminal illness, one of the things they may be worried about is how it will affect work. As their line manager, you can be a big source of support for them.
What are life-limiting and terminal illnesses?
A life-limiting illness is one which cannot be cured, though it can be treated, and which will shorten a person’s life.
A terminal illness is one that is incurable however the effects of the illness can be managed so that a person can live with it for days, weeks, months or even years.
Having difficult conversations
Before you can support your team member, you will need to talk about their diagnosis and understand their needs.
This is likely to be a challenge for both of you. It may be sad or uncomfortable, but it's better than ignoring or avoiding the situation.
If you’re worried about what to say, you can discuss it with someone you trust first. Try not to be offended if they don't want to share everything.
It’s likely you will have many small conversations, rather than one that captures everything.
-
Consider beginning with a question rather than a statement: “Have you wondered how this will affect work…?”; “Do you think we should talk about…?”
Be totally honest about how you feel from the start. If you’re open, there may be either laughter or tears – don’t be afraid of either.
Listen to what the other person is saying, rather than always steering the conversation yourself.
Don’t feel the need to fill silences – leave room for the other person to bring up subjects that are important to them.
-
This page from Macmillan Cancer support may be helpful: What to say to someone who has cancer
There is a downloadable PDF booklet.
For advice and guidance in supporting someone who has cancer, you can also call the free Macmillan Support Line on 0808 808 00 00.
Learning about their diagnosis
Your colleague will become the expert in their own condition and how it affects them.
If you want to find out more about their diagnosis to support them better, websites such as NHS.UK provide trustworthy information.
Employee rights
If an employee is too ill to work, or receives a terminal diagnosis, they are protected by various laws and rights in the UK, as well as any rights provided by your employer.
Your HR team will be able to help.
-
All employees have the legal right to request flexible working if they have worked for the same employer for at least 26 weeks.
-
Finances can be a big concern for ill employees.
If your team member is too ill to work they may get statutory sick pay for up to 28 weeks. Your employer may also offer occupational sick pay, so it’s worth checking with your HR team.
-
If your team member has paid into a workplace pension they may be able to receive their pension early if they are terminally ill. This is often referred to as an ill health policy. Your HR department or pension team will be able to clarify your pension policy.
-
As they progress, life-limiting conditions can become disabling. The Equality Act 2010 sets out employers’ duties towards disabled staff.
Some conditions are automatically treated as a disability, including:
- Cancer – including skin growths that need removing before they become cancerous
- Multiple Sclerosis
- An HIV infection – even if the person doesn’t have any symptoms.
Providing support
If an employee is disabled by their condition, they are entitled to reasonable adjustments to help them in the workplace. These can be changes to policies, working practices or physical layouts, or providing extra equipment or support.
An employer only has to make reasonable adjustments if they know or could reasonably be expected to know someone is disabled and that they are disadvantaged because of it.
The first step is to discuss with your colleague what they need. It is a good idea that you document the conversation in writing. You could ask your colleague to write to you so that you have something concrete to work through with your HR team.
There is no limit on the kind of changes employers can make, but they could include:
- Changing hours of work – permanently or for a short while if someone is going back to work after being off sick
- Changing someone’s work duties – like reducing their workload if they have work-related stress
- Allowing someone with back pain more breaks to allow them to stand and move away from their desk.
- If your organisation has an occupational health service, they will be able to help with reasonable adjustments in the workplace.
Mental health
Receiving a difficult diagnosis can affect our mental health. Carrying on working can help someone’s mental health but it can also bring its own stresses.
If you notice signs of stress, or poor mental health, you can discuss with your colleague how well they are coping and see if you can find ways to make things easier.
For example, if travelling to work has become difficult it might be possible for them to do some work from home.
If you have an Employee Assistance Programme (EAP), make sure you signpost to it.
Depending on which provider your organisation works with, they may be able to ask for face-to-face counselling sessions. They can also provide help to you as the line manager if you need it, as helping others through their stress may be difficult for you too.
Long-term sick leave
If someone is off sick for more than four weeks, this counts as long-term sick. They may still be able to return to work, maybe by working flexibly or part-time or doing different or less stressful work.
As their line manager, you will want to keep in touch with your colleague while they are away to see if and when they will be able to return.
Stopping work
A life-limiting or terminal illness may eventually mean that someone has to give up work. Your HR team will be able to advise on any schemes your organisation offers, such as income protection, ill health retirement or whether an employee can take their pension early.
To be able to best support your colleagues, check with your HR team what policies are in place and what benefits are available from your employer for someone with a life-limiting or terminal illness.
If a team member dies
The loss of a team member can be incredibly sad. Depending on their working relationship, colleagues may be deeply affected by the loss. You will very likely feel a range of emotions yourself too.
How the loss is handled and communicated can have a long-lasting impact on the team and wider organisation, so it’s important to have a plan and support available.
Some things to consider
- Ensure everyone is informed quickly and collectively. It is very upsetting to learn of a death second-hand.
- If you’re in touch with the family, asking them how they would like colleagues to remember their loved one or be involved can be thoughtful. For example, asking if they would like colleagues at the funeral.
- Allow staff members to have time off during the time after the death and to attend the funeral.
- Consider different mourning practices across your team
- Provide ways that colleagues can talk about and share memories of the team member who has died. This could be a book, plaque or memorial event.
- Signpost all team members to emotional support such as an Employee Assistance Programme or public bereavement helpline. Details can be found in the Bereavement Signposting section.
- Some team members may require a phased return to work.
- Consider how this may impact performance in the future.
- Keep asking team members how they are doing and if they need support. They may have a delayed reaction or be grieving long after the death. Everyone’s timeline is different.
There is specific guidance available for if a team member dies by suicide.
Next steps
Speak to your HR team about what support is available for employees with a life-limiting or terminal illness. For example, policies, paid or unpaid leave, flexible working, peer support or an Employee Assistance Programme.
Arrange time to speak with the employee. Find somewhere that is quiet and private, and a time where you don't need to rush off. Listen to their concerns, talk about their support needs and document any next steps or actions to take.
Familiarise yourself with the Illness Signposting section. You may want to offer to go through this together.
Keep the conversation going. It is likely you will need to keep talking about the employees support needs, or make changes based on their health.